I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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