I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
