grandma shit on top of the toilet
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
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