No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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