Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
