Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
