I think i peed on brittanys purse
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize