Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize
