East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
