I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
