the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Randomize
