K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
