Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
17 year olds will be the death of me.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i came on her dog
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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