If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
