so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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