He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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