my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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