that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
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