Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
