I'm jealous of your bromance
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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