Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Randomize
