i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
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