just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
