If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Randomize