Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
