Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
