You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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