when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
