Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
