Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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