you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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