Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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