he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
No subtext here. People are naked.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
