if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
