my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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