Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
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