Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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