He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
