Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
