can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
vagina is talking i cant
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize