Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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