I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Randomize
