youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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