stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
