well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
She said her name was "party"
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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