So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize