what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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