Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Come share oat with me in your robe
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I want to fling myself into the sun
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
