Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
we made out on top of his cat.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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