I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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