the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
