Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize